Friday, February 10, 2012

Biggest Boo-Hoo-ser

I'm a big fan of reality television.  Well...  That's not exactly true.  I like a few reality shows.  My favorites include Survivor (although I'm souring on that), Swamp People, America's Got Talent, My Big Redneck Vacation, The Amazing Race, Worst Cooks in America, and Bayou Billionaires.

No, I'm not a fan of any of the Wives or American Idol (it went to pot, IMO, when Simon left), pretty much any show on TLC (although The Editor loves that channel), The Bachelor (or Bachelorette), or even Dancing With The Stars (although I did use to enjoy it, too).

I say I'm souring on Survivor because it's gotten so completely repetitive.  They use the exact same algorithm to figure out who is going to be on it, and it's gotten to the point that it feels almost...well...political.  If you've watched it like I have, you could probably see it too.  I mean, there's almost this feel of political correctness in who is going to be on it so that no one group feels left out.  Honestly, in my opinion, it's getting old.  Oh, I do still enjoy seeing the competitions, but...  I'm really getting tired of the "we've got the whole of America represented here, let's see how this mini-society decides to rip itself apart" feel.  I don't know if I'll be watching this season or not yet.  It depends on if The Editor decides to.

And don't get me started on Dancing With The Stars.  Holy.  Schnickeys.  Talk about political.  Sheesh!

But the point of this column is this:  I am really beginning to hate the reality show The Biggest Loser.

Oh, the trainers on it are cool!  I mean, I would LOVE to train with the likes of Dolvett or Bob.  Or even Jillian (which I do on a semi-weekly basis; her Six-Pack in Six Weeks DVD is a KILLER!).  Or even Brett Hoebel, who is now on Food Network's Fat Chef.  The other trainers they've had are kinda...  eh.  I could live with them or without them.

And Alison Sweeney.  Who wouldn't like to get to talk to her on a daily/weekly basis?  Woah.

But it's the people that get on it that are really ticking me off.

I know, I know.  You're asking "If you don't like it so much, then why do you watch it?"

Two words:  The Editor.

She LOVES this show.

When it first started, I thought it was a pretty good show.  I mean, I was even jealous of the people who got to be on the show.  Heck, I'd give my eye teeth to get to go on it!  Although there are a few parts that I just don't think I'd enjoy (working out until you puke, anyone?), it's the over-arching "I'm here to lose weight" thing that I would truly enjoy getting to do.

And that's why I'd be on there.  I honestly don't care if I won anything or not.

Yes, I'm one of those "idiots" who doesn't much care for the game.  I don't enjoy playing games if there's other crap involved.  Now, if it's a game for the sake of being a game, hey, I'm all in.  But these people?  They're here to lose weight.  And, oh yes, there's a game going on on top of that.  "Hey, let's stick it to this guy because we believe he can do it at home, plus, it gets us closer to that quarter-million-dollars we all want so badly."

Yeah.  I don't think so.

But back to what I was saying.

If there is one part of this show that I absolutely hate, it's the "let's delve into your past to figure out why you're so fat and then broadcast it to the world."

I honestly don't want to know that information.

Oh, yes, I do agree that it's important that someone understand why they have their hang-ups and foibles and learn how to deal with it constructively so they can better their lives.  But to play that out and tell the world all their deepest, darkest secrets?  I don't think so.  It's invasive.  It's intrusive.  It's sad.

Which brings me to...

The crying.  Holy. Cow.  I am SO tired of all the crying.  Especially from the men.  Sure, it's OK to be emotional.  But every stinking episode?  Really?  Who are you?  John Boehner?  SUCK IT UP!  BE A MAN!  I'm not saying "Be Macho."  I'm saying "Grow up!  Yes, bad things happened to you!  It's time to let it go and be an adult!"  I can understand if your spouse and children were killed by a drunk driver.  That's heartbreaking and deserving of tears.  But to cry for stupid reasons?  You know, like last season's professional football player who broke down during NFL week and Alison said there were two NFL pros out on the field, which offended him because he was one at one time?  SERIOUSLY?  Oh, poor wittle baby.  You got youw feewings huwt, didn't youw...

And it's like this every season.  I'm ready to gouge my eyes out.

*stepping off my soap box now*

Well, it's Friday.  I do hope you guys have a great weekend.  I'm going to take my 9yo to see Star Wars Episode I (in 3D), and then go learn how to Rumba at my dance class...  

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