Weighing Down

Well, it's now been six weeks.  Give or take, I mean.  I think it's been more like six and a half, but that's OK.

I'm actually pretty excited today!  My official weigh-in has me down 34.4 lbs!  w00t!

However, I'm aching today.  Seriously.  Aching all over.  I ache in places I didn't realize I had muscles.

I've mentioned before that I do water aerobics.  Well, last week, I did it four different times, as well as Jillian Michael's Six Week Six Pack DVD, the dancing thing AND I did some--but not much--walking.  More on why I didn't do much in my column I'm thinking about for tomorrow or Thursday.

I seriously over-did it last week, I think.  On the scale, it was pretty awesome.  I mean, I dropped a little over five pounds last week.  Who wouldn't enjoy that?  Well, my body certainly didn't.  

But that doesn't mean I'm going to stop.

I'm hoping that I'll get used to the stricter, more active regimen that I'm trying to force myself into.  It's been pretty helpful that I've gone to the lengths that I have to work out.  And with our amazing water aerobics instructor, she's really giving it to us and forcing us to work our butts off.

And it's obviously working.

I've even been told by a LOT of people that they can tell a big difference in me.  My face has slimmed down considerably, and my body has dropped two sizes in pants AND shirts.  Heck--and this is TMI I know--I've even dropped a size in my underwear.  Going to have to go buy some new ones soon.

Speaking of buying new clothes, I finally broke down and bought some new pants.  I only had one pair of 42x30s, and one cannot live on only one pair of pants.  My 44x30s and 46x30s now look like clown pants.  The 42x30s are slightly tight, but they're getting looser.  I'd love to be on 42x30s by April.  I'm hoping to be in either 38x30s or 36x30s by December.

I've dropped enough weight up top to go from a 5XL to a 3XL.  This is important to me, because of our upcoming trip to Walt Disney World.  It's difficult at best to find clothes that are larger than a 2XL available in the shops at WDW, so my goal by the time I get there is to be in an XL shirt.  That way, I know I'll be able to just walk into any clothing store in the World and buy whatever shirt or shorts or pants or jacket or whatever I want, and be absolutely sure I'll fit into it.

But I digress.

I was talking about water aerobics and how our instructor is really killing us.

Take last night for example.  Last night was "Latin" night, so we had to listen to Latin music.  Which isn't a problem for me, except we have to keep up with the beat of the music.

And Latin music is FAST.  

And not only that, she worked in a new exercise that--holy crap--is HARD.  Basically, it's just jumping.  But it's a little more than that.  For twenty (20) seconds, we had to LEAP up and out of the water as fast and as high as we could, immediately leaping up and out as soon as we came back down.  Then, we would get a ten (10) second rest to "catch our breath" (HA!), and then it would start all over again.  

Eight.

Times.

I felt like I was going to have a heart attack.

This exercise is SO much harder than the Patty Cake (well, that's what *I* call it) one she came up with last week.  In that one, you have to pair up with someone about your height.  Then, you both leap up and out of the water, and, at the pinnacle, clap your hands together with theirs.  Twice.  And you had to have clapped twice before you came back down.

And we did it for a minute and a half.

Twice.

With barely ten seconds breather in between.

I know it sounds like I'm complaining.  And, from a certain point of view, I know I am.  BUT!!!!  It's actually working well.  Really well.  I can't expect this fat to melt off my body without me doing something easy.  

In other news, along with exercise, it's also important to eat right.  My family has really been enjoying different types of hummus lately.  Especially since it's so low in calories.  Yes, it is a little high in fat, but that's OK.  It's good fat.  Yesterday, I gave you the recipe for Sun Dried Tomato hummus.  Talk about YUMMY.  Today, I'm going to give you a different recipe.  It's called Black Bean Hummus.  And it's even better than the one from yesterday, if you can believe it.  I found this one on SparkPeople.  I changed it up just a tiny bit to make it where my family enjoys it more.

Ingredients:

3 1/2 cups canned black beans, rinsed and drained

1 small sweet onion, diced

1/2 green bell pepper, diced

3 cloves of garlic, sliced

2 tbsp ground cumin

2 tsp ground red pepper

1 1/2 tsp extra virgin olive oil

2 tbsp cilantro (optional--you don't have to use it if you don't like it)

1/4 c (MAX!!!) vegetable broth.

Sea salt and black pepper to taste

Directions:

1. In a small skillet over medium-high heat, pour in the EVOO, onion, green bell pepper, and garlic.  Saute until caramelized, about three minutes.
2. While those are caramelizing, rinse and drain your black beans, and place them into a food processor.  
3. Drop in the onion, bell pepper, and garlic.
4. Add in the spices and tear off the 2 tbsp cilantro from your fresh bunch.
5. Clip on the lid (or whatever you have to do with yours), and pulse until it's all combined.
6. IF it's too thick for you, add in some of the vegetable broth, about a tablespoon at a time.  I haven't had to do this, because my family really likes it thick.  Anyway, add any salt and pepper you need to it to make it suit your family's tastes.

I typically serve this with some new multi-grain flatbread that I found that has 100 calories per slice.  I cut it up into wedges, then spray it with my EVOO mister, and broil it for a couple minutes to get it toasted.  Anyway, it's called Flatout.  It's a tiny bit more expensive than regular flat bread, but for only 100 calories a slice and I can use three slices to feed my family of six, well...  That's not too bad.  I use this for all my hummus recipes.

Oh!  The hummus makes eight 1/2 cup servings.  Each serving has roughly 123 calories, 1.6 g of fat, and 7.3 g of protien, so it's LOADED with protein and will go a long way.  

All Ribbons and Bows

Last weekend, pretty much at the last minute, I was informed that I was going to take my 5-year-old daughter to a Daddy-Daughter Dance.

So I could "practice my new-found dance moves."

Oh, what fun.  

Actually, I shouldn't complain now, because we actually had a terrific time.  But the prospect of me being a six-foot-tall, overweight man taking his three-foot-tall underweight daughter to a dance was rather, well, daunting.

I have learned a few things about Daddy-Daughter Dances that I think I should pass along to anyone who wants to know these things:

1)  TAKE PLENTY OF CASH.

Holy.  Cow.  Everything costs at a Daddy-Daughter Dance.  And if you don't want to be "THAT" Daddy, you need to be prepared to fork over your life savings to make your daughter just as squealing happy as she can be.  You'd think with an expensive cover-price that it would all be included. 

You'd be wrong.

There was a cost "per couple" (which just doesn't sit right with me) to get in.  There was a cost for the rose that every girl has to have.  There was a cost for the balloon.  There was a cost for the pictures.  There was a cost for a stuffed bear (in three different colors).  There was a cost for a stuffed monkey (also in three different colors).  I'm sure there were costs for other things that I didn't see.

So, just take at least $100 with you and be prepared to spend every dime of it.

2)  THERE IS MUSIC THEY SHOULD NEVER PLAY.

I don't know who DJs these things, but I think they need to be punched in the throat for playing some songs.  Sure, there are songs that everyone enjoyed, but then there are songs that should never, EVER be played at a Daddy-Daughter Dance.

• Michael W. Smith's Cinderella
• Any song with the words "I want to have sex with you" (or something very similar) in the lyrics.  And yes, they did play a few.
• Bon Jovi's I'll Be There For You
• Any song that could potentially reduce a grown man to tears because of his daughter.  It's not pretty.  I'm still having nightmares about it.

3)  GET READY FOR LINES.

It doesn't matter if you're trying to get your daughter a stuffed bear, a stuffed monkey, a rose, a cookie, some punch, pictures...  The list goes on and on.  Every time we had to go stand in line and my Cub Reporter would complain about it, I'd just tell her that it was great practice for when we go to Disney World in December.

I'm pretty sure we are WELL PREPARED for standing in line at Disney World now.  

4)  THERE ARE MEN THERE WHO CAN DANCE FAR BETTER THAN YOU CAN.

Just suck it up.  You cannot dance as well as others can.  I swear, there was a guy there who could give Max Comehereandcheckmyspellingkovsky a run for his money.  I was totally intimidated and felt completely out of my element.

But I sucked it up and danced with my daughter.

She can dance FAR better than I can.

But it was probably one of the best experiences of my life.

I have the picture to prove it.

And I can't wait for next year's.

Just Call Me Derek Hough-N-Pough

To add insult to injury in my weight-loss scheme, my co-worker has convinced me to sign up for...of all things...DANCE CLASSES.

"Even Doctor Oz says it's great for you!  It helps both your mind AND your body!"

In other words, "Get Sane While You Get Thin."  

I need these classes.

In the worst possible way.

I started them last Friday night, and have to go back tonight (hey, I spent $100 on these classes, I might as well continue!).  They are held at a local community college in their Community Outreach program.  One hour of it has Country and Western Dancing firmly centered in its sites, and the second hour of it is Ballroom.

Plus, the first hour of the class is chock-full of people.  There are like twelve couples, three little old lady sisters (did you ever catch an episode of The Nanny with Fran Drescher?  The little old lady sisters look like Fran's grandmother on that show.  With bigger teeth.), another very tall, very thin older woman who, apparently, has been taking classes there for YEARS (and it shows), and then me.

Being from Oklahoma, if there's one dance move I can do, it's a Two-Step.  It's in our blood.  Try doing it with the three sisters who aren't from this country, spoke little-to-no-English (they spoke some kind of -ese: Chinese, Vietnamese, Japanese, I couldn't really tell), and laughed at me the entire time.  With some kind of rancid fish on their breath.

Or maybe the one I was dancing with was laughing from embarrassment as the other two laughed at her for dancing with the big American lummox.  I dunno.

And that's pretty much all we did the entire hour.  Sure, we danced the Electric Slide.  ONCE.  The rest of the time was the Two-Step.

Once that hour was up, everyone but me and one other couple stayed, and then another couple showed up. So, yes, it was me and two couples.  

Yea me.

Fortunately, I found out that the other "couple" that stayed weren't a couple at all.  Just like my co-worker and I are close friends, so are they.

Oh, didn't I mention why my co-worker--the one who convinced me to go--wasn't there?

Yeah.

She tore up her knee the Sunday before the class started.

So not only was I there alone, but I didn't know a soul.

It's hard to describe the entire thing without using the word "cluster" in there somewhere.  But on the upside....  Y'all, I can now FOXTROT!  w00t!

If you've ever wanted to know how to do a basic Foxtrot, it's simply a reverse half-twist of the Two-Step.  In a Two-Step, you step with your left foot, slide your right foot up to it, then take two more normal steps.  A Foxtrot is where you take two normal steps, then, using your left foot, step to the side and then slide your right foot over to it.

Make sense?

Yeah, it took me a while to catch on, too.

And THEN the instructor gave us two more moves (the "Promenade" and the "How to get out of a corner") after we got that down.

Yeah, it took me a LONG while to catch on, too.

In the end, I did get to dance about three-quarters of the time with the other lady who was there.  Her friend--who has been taking classes longer than she has--was gracious and allowed me to learn the steps with a partner.  

I'm ready to go on Dancing with the Stars now.

KIDDING!

But I do need to go get ready for the Waltz tonight.  I'm actually looking forward to it!