Monday, January 30, 2012

Oh Sole MiO!

(This is not a paid advertisement, nor any kind of endorsement.  Although, if it were, that would be kind of cool.  I mean, I've never gotten any kind of endorsement from anyone before.  And to get one from the makers of MiO?  HOW AWESOME WOULD THAT BE?!?!?  But I digress.  On to the post for the day...)

Three pigs went out to dinner one night.  When the waiter asked for their drink order, the first one said he wanted the best red wine the restaurant served.  The second one asked for a Diet Coke, and the third one asked for "water.  Lots and lots of water."

When the waiter returned and inquired about the pigs' meal order, the first one asked for roast beef with garlic mashed potatoes and buttered green beans.  The second pig ordered a salad.  The third ordered "water.  Lots and lots of water."

The waiter thought this was odd, but went on about his business.

After the pigs were finished with their meal, the waiter inquired about dessert.  The first ordered New York Cheesecake with Cherries Jubilee, the second ordered some meringue cookies, and the third ordered "water.  Lots and lots of water."

When it came time for the check, the waiter said that he really had to ask a question.  He understood the first one must be the piggy who had roast beef, and the second must be the one who had none.  But the third?  "What is it with all this water you keep ordering?"

The third pig responded with "Well, how else am I going to go wee wee wee all the way home?"

I know it's a lame joke, but I do enjoy it.

Especially with that's pretty much how I feel right now.

You see, since I started this diet I'm on (I started it January 9, 2012), I've been trying to drink at least eight cups of water a day.  Eight.  Cups.  Of water.

Every.

Day.

I'd like to meet the guy who decided we need to drink eight cups of water every day, and give him a high five.

In the face.

With a water cooler.

I hate water.  I truly do.  It's just water.  There's nothing special about it.  It's just there and it's wet.  And, if it's bottled and has an "Aquafina" label on it, it's got a chemical whang to it.

So since I've started this water kick, I do have a question that directly relates to the joke I told earlier:  Why is it that when you drink eight cups of water a day, you pee ten?  Seriously.  I have to drink it all by three o'clock in the afternoon, or I'm up all freaking night running back and forth to the bathroom.  I learned this the hard way.  On the third night of only getting to sleep in hour-and-a-half increments, I was ready to give it up or dramatically change the way I'm doing things.

Enter MiO.

This stuff has GOT to have Crack in it!

Zero calories, expensive as all get-out, but two or three little squirts into a 16.9oz water bottle?  It makes all the difference in the world.  Right now, my favorites are Black Cherry MiOEnergy, Berry Pomegranate, and Peach Mango.  Ooooh YUM!

Yes, as I said, it is expensive.  Around here, it's roughly $3.50 per bottle.  BUT the regular MiO makes 24 servings.  The MiOEnergy makes 18.

While the MiOEnergy doesn't give you the energy of, say, a cup of coffee, it is still delicious.  I don't recommend the Green Lightning (or whatever it's called) flavor though.  IMO, it tastes like very flat, been-sitting-there-so-long-its-started-to-turn Mountain Dew.  But the Black Cherry is most excellent.

If you're on a diet and trying to get all that water down you?  I highly recommend this stuff.  Plus, it has ZERO Aspertame.  So, no headache for me!  Bonus!

I now no longer have any problems drinking all that water.  Heck, I get it drunk by noon.

Unfortunately, this means that I spend the second half of my work day running back and forth to the bathroom.

Gotta go!

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